Showing posts with label Arizona Cardinals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Arizona Cardinals. Show all posts

Saturday, October 27, 2007

NFL Talent Pool Grows


The dawn of a new era is upon us! Stem cell research, fertility clinics, genetic mapping, they're all sources of building bigger better faster.

With the NFL expansion comes a strain on the NFL talent pool causing more players to see more action and quite frankly they're not ready. A Record number of injuries plague the NFL this season causing unprepared and unconditioned players to take the field before they're ready. Profesional athletes are simply not meeting the demand of todays game.

NFL players approach building the next super human the old fashioned way... the stong will survive. By spreading their seed to as many females as possible, todays NFL athlete plans on creating as many super athletes for tomorrow.

By not marrying, this leaves the athlete open to polygismatic relationships , allowing for multiple relationships and multiple offspring.

This 20 year plan includes benefits of financial security for the illegitimate children in the form of lawsuits and child support, a great NFL players mentor program, and assurance that genetically the child will have the best chances available to compete in years to come.

This is a far from a new development by the way of professional athletes today. The NFL has, however, realized the potential gain from past indiscretions. It is reported that currently Arizona Cardinals wide receiver Larry Fitzgerald is expecting his first child in early January. DNA testing is scheduled to ensure the Raiders Cheerleader unborn is in fact his. The paternity suit is merely a formality to ensure the child's financial wellbeing contractually.

NFL future players success story, Denver Broncos RB Travis Henry, has 10 children from reportedly 9 different women.

From Bagboy to Busboy



Good 'ol Brenda Warner is up to it again. Satan's spawn, aka Alice, aka Brenda literally has no respect for Kurt. He scratched and clawed his way back from bagboy at a supermarket to become an elite NFL quarterback, (at least in 1999) but she won't let him forget his roots.

Brenda who apparently has bigger (and I'm sure hairier ) testicles than Kurt says if you're well enough to go outside and play your well enough to do the fucking dishes! Are you kidding me? The set on this lady.

Come on Brenda know your duty as an NFL players wife. Get your ass in the kitchen, take care of your man, and for god sake get a little more work done. The new blonde wig ain't fooling anybody! As for you, Kurt, grow a pair!

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Kent Somers
The Arizona Republic
Oct. 25, 2007 12:00 AM wrote:

Turns out there is a downside to playing hurt in the NFL.

Cardinals quarterback Kurt Warner was lauded for playing last week against the Redskins despite having a torn ligament in his left elbow. But the injury didn't get him much sympathy at home.

"The worst thing," Warner said, "is when you play a football game how do you go to your wife and say, 'Well, honey, I can't clean the dishes.'



"It's a good thing out here with the football team, not such a good thing at home when it comes to the 'to-do' list."

www.azcentral.com/sports/cardinals/articles/1025cardinalsnb1025.html
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Disclaimer: This post was originally posted on 10-25-07 through another medium.